Ever have the feeling that you are trying to pour from an empty cup? That you are juggling too many balls?
Do you completely relate to the saying I’m not an early bird or a night owl, I am a permanently exhaust pigeon.
Well, my friend you are not alone. There are times that I feel like I have control of all the balls I am juggling, I feel happy, content and can see the beauty of life and am grateful for what each day brings.
Yet, there are times when the balls I am juggling in life come crashing down. Sometimes it can be just one ball and sometimes I lose control of them all.
And when I really think about the times when I feel like I have lost control of everything I am trying to juggle, parenting, family, friends and work (just a few things to name) I realise that there are two big factors contributing to why I feel like this.
Firstly, exhaustion. Lack of sleep and having 50 shades of dark under my eyes affects how i feel about myself and how I manage and react to situations throughout my day.
Secondly, control. Not feeling in control can cause me to doubt myself and feel anxious. Feeling like a failure if I feel that I am not in control of all my roles i have and comparing myself to the perfect posts on social media, where it conveys that everyone is in control and perfecting life.
And the unfortunate reality is that both these factors impact on mental health and blur what is reality, cause negative thinking and ultimately cause a vicious cycle of exhaustion and not feeling in control. And although I would love to help your baby sleep through the night and love to make your work day less stressful, there is no magic wand.
But what we can do is learn to be aware of how we are feeling, be more in tune with our thoughts and overall be more mindful. This alongside, small and realistic steps can make a big difference. We all need a reminder of this at times, myself included.
Just Breathe; you don’t have to figure it all out today, just figure out something that will make you feel better in that moment. The rest? Take it day by day.
Let Go; We can’t control everything, as much as we would like to and by thinking this we set ourselves up to fail. Over thinking and being in control can go hand in hand but sometimes we just have to let go and let it be.
Don’t Compare ; The mum who you think has it all together probably feels the same as you. The person at work who is always seems so confident, probably does not always feel confident. We all wear masks that we want people to see but it’s ok to take off our masks if we need too.
Have Perspective ; We all need to look at life from a different perspective sometimes. For example, sometimes we all need to look at life through the eyes of a child. And sometimes we need a reminder that confidence is not “will they like me” Confidence is “I will be fine if they don’t ”.
Ask for Help; Quite often the people who need help sometimes, look like people who don’t need help. We all need a little help sometimes and asking for help is not weak, it is brave and wise.
Be Kind; Don’t forget to be kind to yourself and be careful how you talk to yourself as you are always listening. Your best is good enough and remember we are all winging it through life.
And finally, you my friend are braver than you believe, stronger than you seem and smarter than you think.
Think Less, Live More.